string of curses

after a fairly nice may afternoon the weather changed considerably. by 8pm the temperature had dropped by almost 10 degrees, it was threatening to rain and i was not pleased. on my way home from work here's what my thoughts might have sounded like: 

omg why is it so cold out here  really should have worn longjohns  these shoes are killing me  that bike better not be locked to mine  shit why can’t i get the key out of the lock  why would you lock your bike so it has to be peeled off and then kept from falling    woah that wind is ripping my ears off  now my earring's tangled up in my scarf why am i even still wearing a scarf  ok what are you doing tell me what you're doing!  sure let’s say good-bye right in the middle of the road  at least it’s not raining cold and raining it’s coming up to june for pete’s sake nice outfit yup you’re freezing your ankles and toes off     oh here comes the rain almost made it damn where’s my lock not going back now use the back-up maybe find it tomorrow   really can’t wear these shoes anymore  jeeze why is it so hot in here

(also some of it may have been said aloud...)

rolling again!

shiny new valve

rode to work today.  yes, on my bike.  that i fixed. by myself. i rode gingerly. afraid to go over bumps, afraid to change gears. 

this morning i finally had that thank you meal with R - you know, the guy who was right about my keys returning once we cut off the lock, ...ok, HE cut off the lock, i watched.  i'm glad i was clever enough to arrange it so that i could reward myself for his efforts by getting to spend even more time with him and call it "buying him breakfast".

i wasn't going to bring up the bike, because he's a bit of a compulsive helper, but he said: "so, how's it going?"  what am i gonna do, lie?  so, i spilled and i learned that i can use the wrong valve, it's a matter of sticking a smaller object through a larger hole.  the opposite would have been a problem.  that's good news!

quickly resuming bike-unrelated topics we enjoyed our breakfast and an awesome chat.  then i rushed home to try to finish my project and get the bike out of my livingroom!


reassembly started off promising.  i followed the youtube instructions for getting the tire on the wheel and the inner tube inside, it was pretty easy.  later, temples sweaty from pumping air past the valve for a good 5 minutes before i realized what i was doing, i noticed that just by chance i'd put the tire on the correct way!  encouraged by my good fortune i barreled on and wondered:  how far down should i push the axle in the slots?  is it even?  how far can i adjust the fender to give the tire enough room?  did i tighten the nuts enough? how many times can i wash this dirt off my hands before i scrub the skin right through?

finally i was sure there was no chafing and the wheel was happily spinning in place with a minimum of wobble.  any good teacher would have said:  "great!  now take it off and do it again."  luckily, i didn't need a teacher, my chain told me!  it was all bunched up on one side of the nut.  i couldn't be lucky twice.

i looked up the derailleur configuration online.  undid the tire, slung the chain in the right spot and remounted the tire.  but then the chain kept falling off.  it got stuck in the tiny gap between the front gear and the body, and i wondered how it even got in there?  that's when i nearly cried.   so close now!  what if i break the chain?  but i kept fiddling with it and just as mysteriously it slipped back out.  and i didn't break the chain.  and with my fingers covered up to my palms in black grime i realized, i fixed my own flat today! 

i wanted a decent tread, but all they had was mountain bike tires, so it vibrates a little on the street.  but otherwise, i felt pretty pleased with myself when i actually arrived at work and nothing had fallen off.  on my lunch hour i went to see if the tire was still inflated.  yup. it feels good to know how to do it, and it was an important experience for reaching a deeper understanding, but i don't like it.  it's messy.  and finicky.  and it's confusing!  the sizes!  what's 700 even mean?  700 whats?  and what about this strange hybrid of metric and imperial measurement?  1.9?  well, it's bigger than 2 centimetres!  so, since when do we break down inches into decimals?

next time i have a flat, the fairweather cyclists will all have had their fairweather work done, and i'll just drop into my shop and whine:  "fix eeeeet!... and throw in a tuneup, pleeeze", and grin.

i have the money, why should i torture myself?

first attempt

chaos in my living room

since my tire exploded last week, i went to three different stores to find a replacement close enough to what i want. tonight i came home equipped with one new tire from MEC, one of those hook thingies you need to get the old tire off, and an inner tube that will fit, as opposed to the 700 x skinny one my regular mechanic sold me. ...sigh, i thought he knew us. and so did he.

the whole walk home i was worried about the extra point two increments the tire was wider than the 1.9 whatevers of the original one. the guy at MEC told me it shouldn’t be a problem, but i forgot to tell him my bike had fenders.  he also asked me what kind of valve it used.  he showed me the two different types.

i’ve seen a youtube video on how to change a rear tire.  i know the guy makes it look easy, and i know that i need a wrench or two to remove a wheel that isn’t quick release. i was ready to get dirty!

i thought it would be a good idea to take my special virgin project to my apartment.  it was getting dark, i wouldn’t have much time to do it in the morning, and i’m tired of walking!  i could watch television while changing a tire - how cool!  and  in case of reassembly disaster it could all stay sprawled out where it wants until i call for backup or try again another day.

crankiness already set in before i even unlocked the bike, when i tried to decide if i should go upstairs and drop off my luggage first, and come back for the bike, or if i should save a trip and get it all up at once. having chosen option two, there's me trying to lift the bike around the corners of the wheelchair/stroller ramp cluttered with apartment building sized recycle bins on their way to the curb, my basket heavy with my napsack, and the new tire slipping off my shoulder at every step.  the tire didn’t do much better slung around the handlebar as  i scrambled out of the elevator, and scrape-clunk-scrape-clunked my poor flat down the hall to my apartment and sqeezed in through the narrow vestibule.

i turned the dirty monster upside down in my living room.  i did have the presence of angry mind to spread a blanket under the whole mess to spare the beige carpet, before getting out the wrench.

i got  a good amount of weather hardened grease under my fingernails, while trying to get untangled from the chain. how DOES a chain wind around the derailleur? there's another youtube search for later. but taking off the tire was pretty easy, once i remembered to undo the brake.

when i realized the tire might fit into the fender, but i definitely chose the wrong valve, i just washed my hands again with dishsoap to try to get the smell of rubber off, and had some vodka. what’s another few days of walking and taking the streetcar?

on foot

cracked from winter riding

yesterday, as i was leaving for work, not 20 yards from home i heard a big pop, and a huge shriek.  the shriek was me.  the pop was my rear tire exploding.  my bike is now locked up outside my home with a flat.  a truly sad sight.  and scary.  a slightly wounded bicycle always seems an invitation to pilfer.

i called my bike shop in the afternoon, the manager said, "no, it shouldn't take long to fix".  i said, "how's it look for tomorrow"  he put me through to the mechanic.  "what kind of bike do you have?"  asked the mechanic.  he recognizes me, i've been there with many a flat.  "hold on" he said. minutes later i found myself back on the line with the store manager who told me they are full up for the week.  an example of stellar customer service. the manager kept stammering variations on the same thing in order to avoid committing to any kind of alternate solution, "so, yeah, ..."  "probably not gonna be able to..."  "try back next week",  no waiting list, no appointment.  am i to pop in occasionally with my broken down vehicle on the off chance that now there's room for my bike to wait its turn?

today i dropped into the shop on my way to work to find out how it works.

i've been walking.  walking's fun once in a while, especially in this weather - once you accept the sheer lack of speed.  you see stuff.  you get less stressed.  you're unencumbered.  you can pop into a shop without effort.  you can amble like pedestrians do.  pedestrians are so pathetically unaware of their surroundings.  it's a fun exercise.

i went downstairs straight to where the mechanic hangs out and does his magic.  i asked him what the procedure was for getting in line for repair.   he knows my bike.  he handed me an inner tube and said he'd go and get the manager, then he disappeared up the stairs.  i followed him.  "he's just in the bathroom"  i paid for my inner tube.  i now own an inner tube.

the manager said, "i have no idea if he takes appointments, that's up to the mechanic.  go ask him"  after i briefly explained about the impending runaround, he marched right down to the evasive mechanic and came back 5 minutes later saying he'd just talked to the owner on the phone.  their other location could take me right now and fix it while i wait!

how nice!  i was on my way to work.  on foot.  no, he wouldn't be there tomorrow.

it's time to stop being such a little princess and learn how to fix the fucking thing myself!