cycle bitch

model citizen

2011-03-09T19:11:00.000-08:00

so i get wet on my bike tonight. got my little front light flashing and my little back light flashing. i stop at a red light. there’s this policeman standing under the viaduct, waiting for customers. it’s a goldmine down there. kind of a strange curve coming off harbour st, drivers always gridlocking and chasing the light. his car is parked half on the bike path, and half on the sidewalk. he’s standing in the remaining space on the bike path.

my light turns green and while i’m wondering whether he’ll move or make me change lanes, look over my shoulder, signal and all that, i realize that i’ve almost been run over by someone making a right turn into the side of me.

fuuuuck i gasp. i look back and watch him finish his right turn and follow me. i don’t know why he didn’t see me, he must have been on the phone or lighting a cigarette or something. i turn back to the cop i see he steps out of my way, and into the lane!

you! over there!, he points and points, at someone behind me and to the curb in front of me. and i continue on my way,...signal to turn onto the esplanade, ...as i always do.

and just to reduce my amusement, the universe sends me a huge pothole hidden in a puddle and i almost fall off my bike doing a little leap on my seat, legs flailing. i think my seat goes down about an inch from the impact.

and that’s my boring wet ride home.

frozen eye lashes

2010-12-13T13:56:00.000-08:00

it drizzled all day yesterday. today the temperature dropped to -20 degrees. perfect conditions for a total bike freeze.

it took me half an hour to unlock my bike this morning. already loaded into the baskets were two bags full of clothes to take to value village, where i was meeting a friend for a major shopping spree. the u-bar that locks the front wheel to the railing outside, unlocked fine, but i couldn't budge the loop lock that locks the front wheel to the frame.

i carried my locked and loaded bike back up the stairs into the lobby to thaw. i waited a couple of minutes, hoping the lock would turn. it didn't. i parked the slowly melting bike in the warmth, bags and all, grabbed my wallet, and walked over to the tool store that never carries anything i want. i've looked at that store from this side of the street for 15 years, finally went inside last summer, can't remember what i needed, but they didn't have it. today i thought i'd give it another shot and ask for de-icer. nope. it's not a hardware store. it's a professional tools store. one day i may go in and buy myself an overpriced ratchet.

when i got back i unlocked my bike, changed to middle gear while i had the chance, and went on my way. i was 35 minutes behind, when i called my friend to tell her i'd be late. at the first intersection i noticed that only my back break worked. in the next few moments i noticed my bell had turned to stone. "yo, drring, drring!"

i stopped at the home hardware near my house and bought a little bottle of lock de-icer. i had a long way to go. at one point i thought i wouldn't make it.

it was so windy, about a third of the way there, my toes started to get cold. i cover up well. no part of my body was cold, but my toes, and they were better covered, and did more work than my hands! even though i don't wear boots, my toes never get cold! but nothing i did would warm them up. i stopped at a subway station and brought my bike into the heated entrance way. while warming up, i examined my bell. the bottom had filled up with water, and turned the whole mechanism into a pretty ice cube! i squirted in some de-icer just for fun, to see what it would do. it did nothing. after a while of watching people go in and out of the tim horton's i continued my trek. for a minute i could even use the front break!

i kept checking if my toes still hurt. my toes still hurt, wiggle, my toes still hurt. that's a good sign.

i ducked into a warm vestibule two more times, once at a bank and once at another subway station. the nice security guard at the bmo didn't kick me out. i asked the lady using the bank machine how much farther to lansdowne. she said i have to take the streetcar. i pointed at my bike. they live in another world, the folks that take the public transit. it's ok, the security guard didn't even know which way bloor was. i'm from niagara, he said.

my bike and i live in a parallel universe. usually i enjoy it, but today, frozen break, gears, bell, lock, eye lashes, brows, feet and ass, the wind punishing me for being free, i felt alone, invisible, helpless.

i saw a starbucks and almost gave up somewhere two thirds of the way. it would have been so nice to sit down in an overheated coffee shop, with a nice cappuccino, and really heat up those sore toes!

at my last pitstop i called my friend again to let her know where i was, and begged her to tell me i was almost there.

when i finally got to value village, i hugged her and had a little histerical outburst. and then i bought these great hand made socks!

the way home was mostly down hill, the wind in my back. the condensation of my breath on my covered face was escaping through the eye slit. i watched through a curtain of frozen together lashes a guy dragging his bike across a side street, back wheel not turning, and later trying to disengage his breaks.

my feet were warm.

lucky again

2010-10-13T06:27:00.000-07:00

i almost hit a cab yesterday.

now i don't mind giving cab drivers the right of way. i get it, they're working. i like riding cabs and going along swiftly. i sit in the back, and enjoy not being responsible for my own progress. i look out the window and watch people make way.

but when cabbies do stupid shit, that's when i get mad. like yesterday, one HAD to get in his left turn right in front of me, and then he had to stop for a pedestrian, only about 4 feet ahead in my lane. i go pretty slow, so i yelled "woah" and swerved - noticing again that it's time to get my brakes tweaked...and in hindsight how when swerving, i don't look over my shoulder. i kinda wish i hadn't swerved and dented his cab a little.....

i looked back then, the pedestrian had an apologetic look on his face! the shot of adrenaline cost me all of my breakfast i'd fuelled up - the entire petit beurre cookie! and riding off i started shaking, and was figuring out how i could integrate more kicking and punching in my riding.

look ahead, guys!